Man Misses Good Old Days When You Could Speak Freely And Operate On Patients Without Anesthesia

Photo by Jakob Owens on Unsplash

Wishing he could go back in time to a simpler time, Bernie Lofoten described the forgotten perks of being allowed to speak your mind uncensored and not having access to anesthesia to go through horrendous surgery.

“Imagine what it must have been like two hundred years ago, back when you wouldn’t lose your job for making a so-called sexist joke and, of course, anesthesia didn’t exist, which means a dentist would take care of a patient’s cavities by making him go through excruciating pain which would be unimaginable today”, said Lofoten, who’s a firm believer that “things were better before.”

“Now we’re living in a society full of weak men and women who can’t even listen to you without getting offended, let alone get anesthesia-free kidney surgery without whining about the terrorizing pain.”

After spraining his ankle following our interview, Lofoten said he would be fine only going back a few years, “to a recent enough year so I can get medicinal weed.”

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Mathieu Boumal

I’m a comedian and writer originally from Belgium. I write for The Daily Mash, Le Gorafi, and other things. Wanna hire me? Sweet. HTTP://boumal.substack.com